My Molly bear is arriving this week. (Weighted bear for bereaved parents). I cannot WAIT to feel Joislens weight on my chest again. I love her so much.
***this night i dreamed of having two bears. and they really brought comfort and i mourned like never before when i held them. this morning i woke up, and my friend told me about alexasbear.com. i guess i will be having two afteralll. and i know people will wonder if im straddling the fence of sanity and insanity. but i will put my bear in the stroller. and take it for a walk. i have waited 20 months to take Joislen for a walk in her stroller. and although i have gone on walks, and felt her with me, i want to physically push a stroller that is filled with her sentiment. and thats what ill do. meet some neighbors for the first time who i hope dont ask too many questions for their sake lol. but ah well! it aint about them!
in my dream i was telling a class that nothing is heavier than the weight of empty arms, shattered dreams, and a broken heart. discovering that picture of joislen on my chest that her dad took, really makes me look forward to feeling her weight again, and dreaming a little.